Actions Have Consequences

When children misbehave the enlightened parenting approach is not to resort to physical punishment. Beyond the obvious fact that beating your kids is against the law there is the essential truth that you will get better training/socialization results by using positive reinforcement. Sure there’s a bit of instant gratification by descending to the Neanderthal response and whapping the incorrigible brat into submission. But, for the long term it is better to demonstrate that the adult is smarter, more civilized, more rational and a better role model than the child or the child’s peers. Reason with the little menace.

My wife, who has worked in schools for many years as both a special needs teacher and a speech/language pathologist, continually refines my understanding of behavior modification. She counsels that the child should be given alternatives. The alternatives let the kid select behavior, knowing in advance what the outcomes will be. Careful selection of the behaviors offered will help the parent to minimize the disruption and aid the training of the child. “If you eat your vegetables now you can watch television afterwards or you can leave the table now and go to bed.” It reminds me of the old cartoon character who weighed alternatives and got something like, “if I do this, I get a cookie, and if I do that I get a lickin”…inevitably, for cartoon effect, the choice was always the one resulting in the “lickin.’”

Well, actions have consequences. If we do something, something else will result. That’s why this piece is hardly a surprise: Natural Consequences

I don’t listen to a lot of country music. When I do, I often like it. It’s still not my default choice, but occasionally it’s got some hooks that make it fun. I liked the Dixie Chicks the minute I heard them. I bought their first CD and when the second one came out, I bought it as well. Good music, lots of fun, easy to listen to.

Then, like so many performers, they succumbed to the belief that talent in one area imbues one with some sort of intellectual capacity in others. Because I can sing and play an instrument, I must also be a great neurosurgeon or possibly an interpreter of world political events. Clearly that might be possible, but in most instances isn’t true. Alec Baldwin is a great actor, Barbra Streisand could sing, and Jane Fonda could marry a string of directors and get great roles playing a whore. But none of them has demonstrated any depth of intellectual capacity in evaluating complex world events. The result is that all of them have first put their silk-shod foot in their mouth and then suffered economic repercussions as they offended large segments of their audience.

The Chicks didn’t learn from observation. Natalie Manes could still sing beautifully while pregnant and wearing some of the tackiest maternity outfits ever seen in public. No problem at all. But when she spouted off on foreign shores about her embarrassment as a Texan over the elected president of the US, she killed a lot of love. It registered with the fans of country music and the hundreds of outlets for that music around the country.

She weasel-worded a bit of an apology, but the damage was done. Now, she and her associates have generated another album and I’ve heard it is quite good in a Pete Seeger, Neil Young sort of self-indulgent lecturing style. But along the way to the mandatory concert tour, the Chicks have somehow forgotten that they need fans. In a series of unfortunate and ill-advised statements, they trashed country music lovers nationwide as ignorant if they don’t agree with Manes’ view of international relations. They’ve bitten the hand of “The View’s” collection of sympathetic women who would be eager to fawn over them. They’ve clearly said that they don’t care about their former fans that can’t quite get their position on defeatist politics.

So, now the fans aren’t breaking down the ticket window bars to get those seats and venues are filled with but a third of their capacity. Cancellations are happening and the Chicks are learning a valuable lesson about the consequences of poor choices.

On the one hand I’m saddened a bit. I liked their sound and their musical poetry. But, on the other hand I’m overjoyed that the heartland folks who are the meat and potatoes of country music aren’t all that reluctant to teach a lesson.

No cookies, no TV, no Xbox and no millions for the tour, honey. Now go to bed without your vegetables. It was your choice.