Death to Talking Points

Here’s a modest proposal. Bear in mind that this is a first cut, so there will have to be some fleshing out of the concept, but the basics are good. Let’s summarily execute any of the congress-critters, national party spokespersons or major network political pundits who use a recognizable “talking point” repeatedly in a discussion. It will be like the old vaudeville “hook”—when the act gets bad enough, we get out the hook. It needs to be some sort of Monty Python-esque block of concrete dropping on them or Dr. Evil sort of trap door under their conference table chair that dumps them into the shark tank.

The brouhaha over high gasoline prices brought this to the surface today as I watched one more in the parade of Congress-stooges spouting:

“If we started in ANWR today, we wouldn’t see a drop of oil for ten years…”
“Oil companies have plenty of leases to drill on, why do they want more…”
“We’ve got to wean ourselves off of foreign oil…”
“We need to end speculation which is driving prices up…”
“Off-shore drilling is too risky…”
“We’ve got to care for the environment…”
“The obscene profits of the oil companies…”

These are all repeated verbatim by too many people to be a random coincidence. That identifies them as scripted “talking points.” Once recognized, justice is served instantaneously. The hammer comes down, the guillotine drops, the trap door opens, the shot rings out, the electric circuit to the chair is closed, the idiot is excised from the body politic.

Or, if we only had an intelligent media, the interviewer might ask, in order of the above:

“But if we never start, when will we have more oil?”
“Have you considered drilling in your back yard for oil? None there? Maybe that’s the same as those leases? Remember why Willy Sutton robbed banks?”
“If you’ve got unexploited oil assets in off-shore, ANWR and shale, but won’t use them how do you wean from foreign oil?”
“Speculators buy futures. If you create a future domestic supply, speculators buy-up of foreign oil becomes worth less. But, doesn’t speculation smooth market swings for every other commodity?”
“What about the newly released stats that only 1% of oil leakage in the oceans comes from off-shore rigs and more than 68% from natural seepage?”
“How does ending civilization care for an environment we aren’t around to enjoy?”
“Why does government think that free-enterprise profit is obscene? And how will taxing that ‘windfall’ reduce costs to the consumer, particularly if you drive business into non-profitability?”

The devastation of publicly humiliating the talking point parrot by illustrating the ridiculousness of the mantra might be almost as good as summary execution, but I don’t think it will be as satisfying or entertaining.