I don’t recall a collective national anticipation ever before to rival the lead-up to the Messiah’s announcement of his running mate. The main-stream media are simply beside themselves with handicapping the “Veepstakes” (ptui, gargle, spit…) Every pundit has pontificated and by the time I rise to post this the name will be on every newspage, all the blogs, incessant on the cable news outlets and running in a crawl on the kid’s Saturday morning cartoon-fest. Frankly, Scarlett…
The “short-list” may or may not have been predictive. I’m honestly thinking that the membership of that select club might really have spent the night burning incense and sacrificing the neighbor’s bull (after all, they are collectivists,) to the gods in the hope that they aren’t the Chosen One’s chosen one. The leaks in the would-be ship-of-state captained by the harpooner who would be Admiral of all he surveys mean that someone tacked to his shoulder for the next four months is going to be dragged through an awful lot of discomfort. “Call me Obama, and this is my first-mate, Joe/Evan/Chet/Kathleen but definitely not Hillary.”
Whether it is a White Whale or a Holy Grail, the poor second-not-in-command will be a yawner evermore. So, who is it this fine day?
I know in advance it isn’t Hillary. No way Barak is going to look at that pasted on malevolent smile across the conference table for the next four years. And, definitely no way he’s going to be ready to put out former-President and intern-chaser fires which would be sure to erupt regularly. Nope, she’s out of the question. Let’s watch on Wednesday and see how she handles the situation.
Joe Biden? I like Joe, but kind of doubt it. Gonna be very tough to point at McCain’s age while trying to sell Joe’s experience. Biden has a lot of history and some of it is with foot firmly in his mouth. The “clean, articulate, black man” comment of less than a year ago is only the tip of that sooty iceberg.
Evan Bayh? Zzzzzzz, snooze, yawn, what? Oh, about Bayh, well let me say this, zzzzzzzz. Ooops, excuse me, nodded off again. Distinguished former Senator and…what? Oh, he’s not “former” just very quiet in the Senate…and Governor of, where was that again? Oh, that’s right, Indiana…zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
Kathleen Sebelius? Well, she fills the woman square. And, she is adequately slender so General McPeak would like her. She’s been a Governor, and her father was a Governor, so that means she knows how to govern and stuff like that. Well, no she’s never had a real job, other than being a state legislator and, did I mention, a Governor?
The dark horse that popped up yesterday on the national scene, but which had been mentioned earlier here in Texas is Congressman Chet Edwards. I’m betting he’s the name on the mornings buzz. History? Not much. Been a congressional intern then a real estate agent. Spent some time in the Texas state senate (31 members) and been in the House of Representatives for nine terms now. I guess that makes him inoffensive and probably doesn’t show up the Messiah for inexperience too badly.
Better get a cup of coffee and turn on the boob plasma screen to see what the real answer is. I doubt I’ll be surprised, but for sure a couple of Democrat contenders are relieved this AM.
Ahhhhhh! It’s Joe! Let the dismantling by recapturing his history now commence.
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