How stupid are they? How about this stupid:
Walk and Cycle Emphasis For Feds
Secretary LaHood, I will extend a cordial invitation for you to come to Texas and try your concept. I'll offer you free room and board at my house, and humbly note that the food is excellent and the wine well worth drinking.
You will get to bring the bicycle of your choice and your best walking shoes. You won't have access to a car and you can't hitch-hike. You will be required to go wherever I go during the week. That includes the college, the grocery store, the post office, the bank, the gun shop. Wherever I go you must go as well, but you will do it without an internal combustion engine. I don't expect you to keep up. Simply make the rounds to demonstrate your plan in practice.