Friday, May 07, 2010

Counter-Productive on Many Levels

I had to go read this item. As a drinking man with global experience, I like to consider myself to have standing beyond the minor league levels. I've been stupid in bars around the world and lived to vaguely remember some of it.

Stop and Go Simultaneously

This is a concept, however, that I just don't get. Alcohol is a depressant. It takes the jagged edges off a rough day. It relaxes you, reduces inhibitions, leaves a euphoric feeling...at least initially.

Why then would you want to do that and at the same time fire up your nerves, jangle your senses and palpitate your heart? On the one hand you are trying to relax and on the other you are trying to keep from relaxing at all.

While you are reducing your mental acuity, you are firing up your energy level so as to be able to demonstrate your stupidity even faster and more aggressively. Why would that be a good idea?

Even if you weren't sending these incredibly conflicting messages to your body and all who surround you, isn't there also the question of enjoyment? If you are going to drink, isn't a major part of it about the taste? I'm not saying you have to swirl, sniff, slosh, gargle and spit then write a pompous essay about the nuances of terroir displayed in that pint of Annie Greensprings. But isn't the drinking supposed to have some good tastes involved?

What then to make of the sampling of that author?

By far the tastiest, it looks, smells and tastes just like someone spilled malt liquor in Welch's Grape Soda


That was the best tasting? Seriously? Welch's Grape Soda is something that most of us haven't tasted since we were four and moved up to the more mature flavor of Nehi Orange Pop. Malt liquor is a fermented concoction that was created to give good beer a bad name. Pouring bad beer into kindergarten bubbly makes the best in show of the energy boozes!

I just don't get the whole thing.

2 comments:

jjet said...

Alcohol mixed with caffeine allows one to stay awake longer for more drinking.

It prolongs the interval from when one acts the witty bon vivant and he becomes the drooling, tongue-lolling somnambulist slouched in the corner.

Also, in the unlikely event that one is lucky to receive the favors of a lady, it keeps one from passing out in the saddle, so to speak.

I would have thought that an elderly gentleman like yourself would be well aware of all this.

nzgarry said...

I guess I live a simple life
But let me make it clear
When I'm apart from my dear wife
I open up a Beer

My friends come round and join right in, and soon we're raisig hell

We do no harm, just have fun
and hope you all do as well.