Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Stimulus/Response

"Gotta save the planet you know. Yes, indeed, those exhalations are the cause. Can't have that carbon dioxide you keep emitting screwing up the weather can we? Let's declare it evil and then tax it! Yes, that's the ticket."

"But, boss, we're in a recession, people are unemployed, taxes are sky-high and your poll numbers are plummeting."

"What do you think, Rahm? Can we turn this around by screwing them over still more? What would Saul Alinsky do? Are they frightened enough about global...what are we calling it this week?...That's right global climate change. Are they scared enough to let us milk this profit center?"

"Sure, boss. They're even dumber than the folks in Chicago. They don't even look for a taste out there in fly-over country. We can stick 'em, no problems. Anybody objects, we call'em racists."

"OK, so here's what we do. First I have EPA declare carbon dioxide a carcinogen and cause of greenhouse effects. Then I want you guys to set up a way to charge folks for it. How about we pull a number out of our butts and declare that the maximum allowed? We then sell stock in that butt-number, sort of like franchises to screw up the atmosphere. If you need more you can buy more from us. They can trade shares between themselves, but we control the total number of shares. Then every year or two we rachet the total amount down so that the shares cost more. We create a market for a product that is totally free and which they can't do without! Ohmigod! We're sort of being capitalists!"

"Genius, boss, simply genius. That's why you're the Messiah!"

So, now we start to get some truth out of (drum-roll and pregnant pause, please) the mainstream media outlet, CBS! Read this on what Cap-and-Trade will mean to you:

Effectively a Fifteen Percent Tax Hike

That's right! You won't have a thing that you don't have already, but now it will raise your yearly income tax rate, not your total tax, but the rate you pay by 15%.

It won't stimulate the economy. It won't increase the GDP. In fact it will lower it. It won't improve our position relative to the rest of the world. It won't create jobs, but it will increase unemployment. And, best of all, it won't do a damned thing to effect global weather patterns. It will just take your money out of your pocket.

How's that hope and change working out for you today?

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